Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Grieving

You know, my husband sometimes tells the story of a Franciscan priest he knew who was desperately running to catch a bus. He made it up the steps just before the doors closed shut behind him and plopped down exhausted, proclaiming loudly, "God is good!" A little old lady sitting next to him smiled and said, "Yes... and He would be just as good if you didn't catch the bus!" It's a funny anecdote for a serious subject to follow. Forgive me.

What is it about our fallen human nature that only rejoices in His goodness when things go our way? An unexpected refund arrives in the mail... God is good! A friend shows up with a plate of cookies... God is good!

Cookies or not, God is always good.

Today especially, I will try to remember that God is good. In light of tragedy and sadness, God is good. In light of losing a little one who's face we will not know this side of Heaven. God is good. In light of still carrying that tiny heart that we never once had the pleasure of watching beat. God is good. In light and in shadow, in sunshine and in rain...
in heartbreak...
in sorrow...
in pain...

God is good.

Blessed be God forever.

We beg your prayers as we go through the painful process of letting our little one go.

St. Isidore, pray for us!

132 comments:

  1. Oh dear Charlotte, how my heart aches to read these words. May our Blessed Mother hold you close to her heart. I'm praying for you.

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  2. Oh Charlotte, we were all so extremely saddened to hear of the loss of your precious little one. We will be praying for you and your dear family. {{{Hugs}}}

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  3. Charlotte,
    My prayers are with you and your family. I am so very sorry for your loss ...

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  4. Dear Charlotte,
    I am so sorry for you Charlotte.
    I feel such sadness for you
    However I am so humbled by your ability to still be thankful for the precious moments you had with your dear little one.
    Prayers for you and your family.
    "God is Good" Amen
    Thank you
    God Bless

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  5. Charlotte,

    I'm so sorry for your families loss. You will all be in my prayers.

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  6. Oh no! I'm praying for you et fam. Your faith is so very beautiful and blesses me greatly.

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  7. I'm so sorry for your loss! It's amazing how much we love those little ones that we hardly know. Your faith is inspiring, and I'll be praying for you.

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  8. I am very sorry for your loss. We will pray for healing for you and your family.
    Hugs & Blessings
    Melanie

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  9. Dear Charlotte, I am so very sorry for your loss. Your faith is beautiful. Praying for you...

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  10. thank you for sharing your JOY in the midst of your trial. i will join the many others in raising you up in prayer.

    Pax Vobis - lena
    MT 5:5

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  11. I am so sorry, Charlotte. May your little one's memory be eternal!

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  12. Oh dear sweet Charlotte, I am praying for you and your family and the precious new angel in Heaven. I am thinking about you and sending my love.

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  13. I am so sad to hear this. Covering you and your family in prayer.

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  14. Charlotte, our prayers are with you and your family. I'm so sorry for your loss. I hope you all will feel the comfort of prayers being offered for you.

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  15. Oh, Charlotte. Crying for you this morning. We know this pain. But, you're so blessed because you know the real secret. God is always good. Count on our prayers for you and your family. It's never easy.

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  16. Prayers for you during this time of grieving. God is good!

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  17. Oh Charlotte, my heart broke to receive this news yesterday. I do not even presume to have words of wisdom, despite my four similar losses, as the pain & grieving is so unique for every parent.

    I understand, though, and I am praying.

    May you take comfort in the love and support of this online community, who truly gets it when it comes to the loss of a preborn child. And thank you, sweet friend, for your witness. God IS good! God is always good.

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  18. PS. My husband will be traveling down to your state in a week. How I wish I could accompany him with a pot of soup and innumerable hugs! I am aching to meet you.

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  19. Grant eternal rest unto this little one Lord, and let perpetual light shine upon Charlotte's child. With prayers,

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  20. Charlotte, I had to come out of lurkdom to let you know of my prayers. May God bless you and your family during this difficult time.

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  21. I am oh sooo sorry, Charlotte. My prayers are with you and your dear family right now.

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  22. OH, I'm so sorry Charlotte. Many prayers for your family.

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  23. I'm so sorry to hear this news. You will be held close in prayer. As a mom who has lost a precious little one as well, that sorrow is all too familiar. What a witness you are, reminding all of us that even in the midst of a storm God is Good.

    Blessing to your and your family in the days ahead.

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  24. Praying for you and your family Charlotte.

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  25. Oh Charlotte, I'm so sorry for your loss, and send my prayers to comfort you and your family. Hugs to you!

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  26. I've been praying for you, my friend. And am so sorry to read this news this morning.

    Many prayers and hugs to you and yours as you grieve.

    Love and prayers~

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  27. My prayers and my heart are with you and your family. I am so sorry.

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  28. Charlotte, I'm so very sorry. My heart aches along with yours. I'll be praying for all of you.

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  29. I'm so sorry for your family's loss. I will be praying for all of you.

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  30. Blessed be God forever! Charlotte, I am so very sorry to hear of your loss. Your whole family is in my prayers.

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  31. I am so sorry for your loss, but happy your family has a new saint in Heaven. You will all be in my prayers :)

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  32. I am so very, very sorry.
    Sarah

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  33. Charlotte, you have my prayers for comfort and healing. I'm so sorry.

    Yes, God is good, all the time. But we still would like to know the "whys." Some day.

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  34. I am so sorry to hear this! Your faith is inspiring, Charlotte. May it carry you and your family through this time of suffering. When we lost our wee one last summer, I kept repeating "God is good...all the time" and "I will praise Him...no matter what." My prayers are with you most sincerely.

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  35. Charlotte, I have been praying for your pregnancy, and was so sad to hear this news. My heart is aching for you. Please be assured of my prayers.

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  36. I'm very sorry for your loss. My favorite line from a card I received after losing my first baby to miscarriage said, "We will always treasure the angel who was in our midst, if only for a little while." Though technically, our little babies are saints (not angels), it was comforting. May God comfort you, too, in this time of sorrow.

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  37. Oh sweet sweet friend, I am so sorry to read this this morning. My prayers are for God's arms to be placed around you and your husband and children this week and that you all will feel His presence as you go through this. Your dear little one will be praying for you in the front of the face of God.

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  38. Dear Charlotte,
    We are so sad to hear of the loss of your little one. We will be praying for you & your family.

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  39. I am so very sorry. You are in my prayers.

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  40. Dear Charlotte,
    I'm so sorry! My heart aches for you all. I'm keeping all of you in my prayers.

    Kathy

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  41. Oh Charlotte, what a beautiful attitude you have amidst suffering. I am so, so sorry and sad for you. Our prayers are with you in your terrible grief, starting right now.

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  42. Charlotte, I, too, am praying for you and your family during this difficult time. I am always both saddened and inspired during these times. The inspiration comes from your witness to the beauty of each life, and the witness of those around the country who also see that beauty and each child's precious value. God Bless You.

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  43. My prayers (and a few tears) are with you today. I'm so sorry for your loss. Another saint for heaven. God IS good. Karen +AMDG+

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  44. oh charlotte, i am so sorry. prayers for you and your family in this time of loss.

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  45. Blessed be God forever...

    Blessed be, and is your precious family for the brief love you shared with this most wanted child. Tears for you, dear Charlotte...sharing your grief as one who has known that loss only too well. May you be comforted, may you well remember those precious, beautiful days that your little one was cradled under your heart...peace...

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  46. Uniting my prayers with yours on this sad, sad day. Sending hugs your way, Charlotte. I am so, so sorry.

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  47. Oh, dear Charlotte... I am so sorry to hear this ever so sad news. We will carry you and your family in our prayers.

    May God bless you and Mary hold you in this difficult time.

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  48. My heart just aches for you, Charlotte. I'm so very sorry. Our family will pray for you as we have been since we heard the news.

    I live closer to you than Margaret and I wish I could bring you something.

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  49. I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. I, too, understand the loss of a little one and the grief and pain for those left behind. Our consolation is in the knowledge that our babies are enjoying the Beatific Vision. I am praying for you. May Our Lady help you through this difficult time.

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  50. Poor sweet Mama...Such heartache. I'm so sorry and will keep your grieving heart in my prayers.

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  51. Thank you all very much! I am blessed to be comforted and cared for by family and friends in town and am in need of nothing except prayers. I was able to go to Mass last night and receive the anointing of the sick which brought me a tremendous amount of peace. My faith is not anything to praise or admire. I am reminding myself constantly of God's goodness because I need to believe it right now.

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  52. Oh, Charlotte. I'm so sorry for your loss. Your strength in remembering that God IS good in this time is such a testament to your faith.
    May peace come to you and your family.

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  53. Charlotte, we prayed for you in your joy and we will pray for you in your sorrow. I am so very sorry to hear of your loss.
    Lisa

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  54. I'm so very sorry. Someone so tiny is still so precious.

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  55. Your post is beautiful! Having gone through the loss of 5 babies and also of my husband, I know it takes much strength and grace to remember that "God is good" even in the midst of such sorrow. Thank you for the reminder today!! My prayers go out to you and may our Good God hold you close as your heart heals.

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  56. I am so sorry for your loss. We lost our little one in utero last week, too. My heart aches with you, yet rejoices as we each have new Saints in Heaven to pray for us. You are so right that God is good, through the good and the bad.

    God Bless. You have my prayers.

    Tabitha

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  57. I'm so sorry for your loss.

    This might not help...but it is what I held on to when our son died at 24 weeks. We are Jewish and it is our belief that when a person dies his/her soul is carried to heaven on the prayers of those whom loved him. It is the reason in the Jewish faith we pray Kaddish for ten days following a death. Kaddish is the prayer for the deceased and interestingly says not a word about either death or the person who has died...it is a prayer praising the glory of the Eternal One. When I read your post...that is what I read...a grieving Mother saying Kaddish. The second thing that helped me at that time is...it is a Jewish belief that when we sleep our souls returns to The Almighty One to be refreshed, that is why we awaken refreshed after a good night of sleep...and why upon awakening the first prayer an observant Jew says is a prayer of thanksgiving to The Almighty One for returning our soul to us. While I sleep Our Loving Father holds my soul, and that of ALL of my children close so that we might be refreshed. May the Eternal Comforter be with you.

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  58. Oh Charlotte, my heart broke when I heard the news this morning. I am so sorry for your loss. You and your family will be in my prayers.

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  59. My prayers are with you.
    Our two little girls born into Heaven in 2003 and 2008 are always on the list of siblings that my daughters write. We pray for them and to them for intercassion as well.
    Go IS Good.

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  60. I am so hearbroken to hear of your loss. How I wish I could give you a real hug, but a virtual one will have to do. ((hugs))

    We will be praying for you and your family.

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  61. I feel your pain most sincerely. I just miscarried earlier this month. Ours was due in early Nov. I completely understand your feelings. I will pray for you and your family.

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  62. Charlotte,
    My deepest sympathy and many prayers.

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  63. Charlotte,
    We have been praying for you and your baby and will continue to pray for your family. May God wrap his loving and consoling arms around you.

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  64. I can only offer my prayers and a distant hug to you and your family.

    My heart aches for your sorrow but rejoices to know that you have a saint in Heaven praying for you.

    God bless and yes
    God is so very good!

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  65. Oh Charlotte, my heart breaks for you. I am sorry.

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  66. Oh, we are so sorry for your loss, Charlotte. We are offering our prayers of peace and love from our sheepfold to yours. The Good Shepherd is there for you this week as you cling to him for comfort. And may his most holy and loving Mother wrap your family tight within the folds of her mantle. God Bless your family.

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  67. I am so sorry. Prayers today for you and your family.

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  68. We rejoiced with you and now we grieve with you.God's PEACE be with you.

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  69. Charlotte you will be in our prayers in a special way. I am so heartbroken for you and very sorry to hear about your little one.
    Your faith is inspiring. God is good indeed.

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  70. I am so sorry. Please be assured of our prayers for your family.

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  71. Charlotte, I am so very sorry for your loss. You and your family are in my prayers.

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  72. Oh, Charlotte. I am so very sorry.

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  73. Charlotte I am so very, very sorry. You are in our prayers still. Your post was beautiful and a wonderful albeit bittersweet, reminder that God is indeed always good.

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  74. I'm very sorry, Charlotte. I will be praying for you and your family.

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  75. Oh Charlotte, I'm so very, very sorry for your loss. Know we are all lifting you up in prayer at this time of terrible grief.

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  76. Oh, Charlotte! I'm so sorry to have to read about your sad news. While you must know your little one is in Heaven, safe in the arms of Jesus, it still hurts, I know.

    Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.

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  77. I'm so sorry Charlotte, you and your family and that sweet little one will be in my prayers. God Bless You.

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  78. Charlotte, I am so very sorry for your loss. You and your family will be in my prayers.

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  79. Oh, Charlotte. My heart is aching and praying for you and your family.

    Peace and prayers...

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  80. I am so sorry for your loss. Praying for you and your family.

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  81. I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. I began reading your blog the day you announced this little's life. May God grant you peace and comfort during this time. Praying for you!

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  82. Oh Charlotte,

    I am so sorry to hear of your loss. I so wish I could be there to give you a hug. Know that you are in our prayers now as always. I will pray especially that you continue to have strength to cling to that knowledge that God is good and that he holds your little one close to His heart.

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  83. "...and Heaven Rejoiced to welcome him...." Just as Christ reaches His arms out to receive your child, He also encloses you in His the comfort of His arms, holding you both closely to His breast. Cradling you both in His arms. Loving you always for you are so generous in opening your womb to offer a place for Him to place this precious soul. A soul to live with you, tucked under the precious beats of your joy filled heart. A little body that knew love from the moment of conception and all the days our Lord planned for her little life. Take comfort in His arms. Receive His good love and compassion. Grieve in His presence and let Him fill you with His passion. I will pray for you. Kathi

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  84. OH Charlotte! I'm so deeply sorry for your loss. You and your family are in my prayers.

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  85. I'm so sorry, dear Charlotte. I am so heartbroken for you and your sweet family. I will be keeping you in my prayers.

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  86. Dear Charlotte,

    Know my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. Dena

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  87. you have our prayers...

    do not be afraid for i am with you
    do not be afraid, for i am your God
    i will strengthen you, i will help you
    i will hold you in my hand

    Isaiah 41.10

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  88. My sympathy and prayers on the loss of your little one. Twice, I too, have known this loss , but your beautiful and simple words on your post remind myself and others that our losses are not in vain. Not to minimize the grief, but strength to see us through! May you be comforted with the Peace of Christ and His Joy, eternally. God is Good!

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  89. Charlotte, I am so very sorry for your loss. I will be praying for you and yours.

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  90. You and your family are in my prayers.

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  91. I am so very sorry for your loss, Charlotte. Praying for you, dear.

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  92. Charlotte, I am aching for you and your family. Know that our prayers are with you.

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  93. I'm so sorry. Praying for you and your family.

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  94. Oh, I'm so sorry Charlotte. I'm so heart broken for you, as I already loved your baby too. (as I'm sure all these readers did to)

    Praying for you and your family.

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  95. I am very sorry to read this. God is good. The trials of the this fallen world are difficult, but God is good.

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  96. I am so sorry, Charlotte. I will be praying for your family!

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  97. I am so sorry to hear of your loss. You, your baby, and your family will be in our prayers.

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  98. Grieving with you, Charlotte. Thank you for your beautiful testament of faith, even when it hurts.

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  99. Dear Charlotte, I am so sorry for your huge loss. You will be in my prayers.

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  100. So sorry and thanks for ministery to all during your suffering+

    You bring so much joy to so many. We will pray to Our Lady of Guadalupe for you.

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  101. Charlotte - I am so sorry. I'm praying that God will shower you with his comfort and peace.

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  102. So sorry to hear about your loss, Charlotte. We are praying.

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  103. I pray for our Blessed Mother Mary to wrap you in her mantle.
    My deepest sympathy to your family.

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  104. Dear Charlotte,
    I am so upset to hear that you have lost your precious baby. I am begging your little saint's intercession for comfort and peace for his mommy, daddy and brothers and sisters. I am only a phone call away if you need to talk. (((HUGS)))

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  105. I am so sorry to hear of your loss. Praying for you.

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  106. Dear Charlotte & Sean, we are so grieved for you. God is good, and we will still praise him.....
    but we will lift you up constantly in our prayers this week.

    Let me know if you need anything. I'm free with homeschool teens [also known as tutors/sitters] on Thurs & Fri.

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  107. another saint for your family.
    but so very sorry it had to happen this way.
    praying for you.
    and your family.
    that somehow you will either have your empty arms filled.
    literally.
    or in the very least with grace enough to accept HIS holy and perfect will.
    whatever it may be.

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  108. Dear Charlotte, I am so sorry for your loss of your little angel. Please know that you, your little one, and your family are in my prayers and heart. May Our Lady wrap you in Her loving embrace and hold you close.

    ~Raewyn

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  109. Charlotte,
    I haven't been reading anywhere lately, and I'm so sad that I missed your joyous news...and that I'm late in reading about this and joining you in missing and grieving the loss of this precious one.

    My heart aches. Words are limited in what they can convey, so I'll just say that my heart knows the pain and my prayers are for all of you.

    God bless you with all peace.
    Jen

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  110. Dear Charlotte,

    My heart and prayers go out to you. Your courage and faith are inspiring.

    Thinking of you,
    Lara

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  111. When grief is deepest, silence is longest... so I sit in the quiet with you, nodding through the brimming tears.

    A whole cloud of witnesses keeps company with you, beautiful Charlotte...

    Never alone... no, never alone.

    (((Charlotte)))

    All, all my love....

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  112. My prayers are with you and your family.

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  113. Charlotte, I am so very, very sorry. My prayers for you ....

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  114. Praying for you.

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  115. My heart breaks upon reading this post. Many hugs and prayers for you and your family and may your little Saint in heaven pray for you. {{hugs}}

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  116. My prayers are with you. May you feel the love of those whose lives you bless so richly with your faith.

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  117. Charlotte,

    I am so sorry to hear of your loss. Your family is in my prayers, may our Blessed Mother wrap you in her protective Mantle and give you peace and healing. God bless you,
    Karla in MN

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  118. I am so sorry, Charlotte! You are in my prayers.

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  119. Charlotte,
    I am sorry for your loss. We will pray for you tonight during rosary.

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  120. I'm so sorry-- I'll pray for you and your family... Losing a child is always painful and horrible, even if though God is always good.

    When it was me, I found it helped to (metaphorically) throw myself at the feet of the pieta. And to do most of my crying down in the basement with the laundry, so it wouldn't freak out the younger kids...

    You'll be in my prayers...

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  121. My husband once urged me to let him share in my sorrows. I learned that aside from the marital embrace, there's nothing more intimate than sharing your sorrow with your soulmate. I'm praying that you will allow yourself and others to feel the full extent of your sorrow in the loving arms of Christ Jesus.

    Peace In Christ,

    Elizabeth

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  122. i realize there are no words....

    But i WILL pray for you...that our Saviour will hold you tightly in His arms.

    ~laura

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  124. I want you to know how sorry I am.
    I was wondering if you wanted another handkerchief from my For Your Tears blog. I am praying for your comfort and strength.

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  125. I am so very sorry, Charlotte.

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  126. Charlotte,
    Your family is in my thoughts and prayers. I'm sorry for your loss.

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  127. We'll be keeping you in our prayers.

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  128. Oh dear, I don't know what to say. I am so very sorry for you and your family.

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  129. I'm am just now learning of your sweet baby's passing. You will be in my prayers. Your post was so positive despite the very sad news.

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Thank you for sharing your thoughts and yourself!